Rubbish

Aren't feeling good these days... Had a mixture of feelings.. good & bad... These days other than busy work life, my mind kept asking me this qns... "Do i deserve all these?"

Alot of things happen... I do not know whether to categorize it as an impt date or jus another day cos i myself do not know what & why am I doing all these stupid stuffs... I actually did something which I dare not do over these period of 7years [nt convenient to write it here]... I'm shock that I actually can do it (at least for these few mths)... Haha! Frens dun believe me at all & kept on asking why & some even tease tat eventually it wun prolong... Anyway, i din hope to last forever, jus wana test out how long can it last to maintain like current... I considered it a MAJOR EVENT in my life cos 7yrs ago was a turning point of my life... I suppose its another turning point in my life again.... Probably something good =)

Ever since i made this decision which was like 2mths ago, things are doing pretty well, just a little bit of trying to get used of my new life... Only until early July, i'm more used to it! All i could say is that "I AM ALL OUT OF MY MIND". I wonder am I too bored or jus wana add sparks to my life or wana challenge my life... At times I feel that I'm totally shitty cos I do not even acknowledge watever i've done...

This post is totaly rubbish cos its getting no where... Just like me...
I just wana find a place to vent my frustrations & possible a place to cry out loud...
i'm afraid that its becos of my decision that cause my terrible & ridiculous actions!!

Sorry to cause confusion

CANCELLED ---- W.T.F

Updatez!!

Everything is clarified... He called up to clarify in the evening... =)
"i don't mean it... Please don't think likewise..."

=D

i wonder what the hell did i do that contribute to the unhappiness & resulting that i have to tolerate this kind of behaviour which i'm totally PISSED OFF....


Bloody Hell...

why?

[Mood colour code : Grey, i mean dark grey]

i wonder why i still remember today...
i could not get to sleep yesterday nite as i could not shut off my mind only until 3am. I dare not tell or should i put it in not willing to confide frens cos i noe they will scold me straightaway. I tink its better to keep to myself instead!

Please! I really hope i can be forgetful abt this date & erase this in my future calendar.

Had been pulling a long long face tru out... And i'm craving for cigerettes!! Bad habit... I wonder y i always urge to smoke when i'm in very very bad mood...
But dun worry... only urge, no action was taken! And i assume actions will nt be taken... =)

bad moody date

din hav really good mood yest so i actually went back home early to meet another bad mood fren... georgi's mood is even worst than mine... So we name it as ''Bad Moody Date"... she claims that a good meal will make us feel better... Which i suppose its abit nonsense... Haha!! Anyway, she waited for quite sometime for me to arrive cos of the heavy traffic during peak hour...

Tell u.. she can really eat alot despite her petite size... We ordered a full table of food which i was so stunned lo... There r ribeye steaks, big prawn aglio pasta, casear salads, mushroom soup, garlic bread, potato skin with sour cream & 3 drinks... She always have this bad habit to order so many thing then not finishing... But tis time round she actually finish all even though the food was as tasty except steak.... Upon finishing, she still can tell me "Seems that i'm not enough ley... I tink we need desserts!!" By that time i was like HUH.... Luckily i manage to hint the waiter not to allow her to order anymore things & just to bring over the bill... She is simplily crazy!!!!! She insisted the bill & promise that next bill will be on me... I hope she remember cos she hav a habit of snatching bills.... Btw, the bill was so expensive sia!!! no more next time...

We headed back to her house at East Coast after alittle walk to ease my digestion while she search for more food [ridiculous!!!] & grumbling, complaining etc.... Din went up to her place cos my fren came just in time to fetch me home at this unfamiliar place... Thanks to both~~

I'm so lucky to have so many frens fetching me & sav my time & $$ for all those transport.... Just like this morning, i came to work using LRT then MRT then bus for the 1st time in my 3yrs service in this company.... It took me 1.5hr... WTH!!

Just found out that i have some over due photos awaiting to be uploadmet Georgi for coffee & shopping but forget when is it liao... It was a last min decision cos she was too free liao... Free till she actually came to fetch me from Changi... Haha! Its still so nice of her la... I din take her pic cos she wasn't in the mood for photo taking bah... And partly, i remember she is just like me, we dun like to take pics de... But that day she wore a super low cut & sexy top which will make everybody STARE & go weet~ weet~... But sad to say the pics above din manage to capture a nice angle...

Below was a new pendant i bought during one of my shopping day... Like it alot when i saw it... Its alphabet I... I for iCe...

Below is my mani & pedicure from my malaysia trip... Its damn cheapo & nice... Especially the french one cos its my 1st time to try french manicure... I like it alotz!!! Then the pedicure i like the flowers drawn on my individual toes.... Alot of hardwork wor...

But sad to say, my french mani was destroy by me after 1 week... Wasted!!

As for yesterday, met up wf pearl for dinner at Tampines... Yah!! i noe its super far & for no reason i wouldn't have step into that place which i hated alot... But due to i've got some issues to settle there so i bo bianz lo... Wana thank her for accompanying me to SO FAR after her tiring workday & make her stand tru out the MRT trip from dover till tampines... Haha!! But i guess its a fruitful trip cos we both bought some skin care products from there to make us more beautiful & mei mei... Hope that it works well for both of us.. If not the money dump will be wasted liao...

[spend alot of $$ ah~~]

Will be meeting her later to accompany her to do threading...

[dilemma in decision making cos i'm too contridicting to decide]

missing

Been lazy to blog lately...

Things hasn't been good these days for both work & life & myself...

Always feel that there's something missing out there...

Shopping Therapy doesn't bring joy like before...

Pampering myself doesn't bring back my smile like it used to be...

Yesterday, I even stay home to enjoy the joy of channel switching till 12+am...

I wonder why "moodiness" kept lingering around me....

This morning i wake up remembering that last nite i was waken by people quarelling loudly @3am scolding !@#$% & not forgetting i dreamt of him after so long...

And coincidencely, this morning i saw him in the record viewing my profile...

I wonder why out from no where he came into my dream...

Even though its only a short one but every details seems so real...

But i guess my reaction in the dream should be my actual behaviour bah...

hope that the rain will make me feel cos i love the smell of rain...

distracting myself

Was a kinda bad day.... woke up feeling nt enuff sleep... no appetite for breakfast... reach office at 9am & saw that my order was a total chaos... Was feeling so bad till i can't even bother to react/scold any1... I tink tml then i scold bah... everything seems so un-right today... Haiz!!

My head is aching like nobody's business... Feeling giddy since morning.... I wonder is it becos i haven eat anything for today yet... I'm drinking my 2nd coffee nw but it doesn't seems to help to keep me awake... haiz!! Was actually feeling giddy, restless, lazy & hungry or shld i say famished right at tis moment... Complicated hor... Feel shitty!! Trying to distract myself by typing a post as i hardly update anything these days...

Oh ya! One thing i wana jot it down.... 27th September was Andy Lau aka my hubby's birthday... Read the newspaper & gt to noe that he is 47 oredi.... Wow! we have a 23yrs age gap... Pretty large & disheartening figures.... Can't believe myself to be so in luv with tis OLD guy... Haha!! [just bear with the craziness when talking about him..... cannot control]

During weekend, went to celebrate my little nephew Jayden's 1st Birthday... He so cute~ so adorable~ I took alot of his pics... Will update a few once done with uploading...

Right at tis moment just show alittle bit of his cute-ness... His birthday cake!!! Tadah~

I noe my post is getting to no where cos i gt nothing in mind to blog... So its bits & pieces everywhere... As i said it a post "distracting myself"....

Please bear with it lo~~

Wasn't feeling gd these days... kinda worried about a fren...

[Craving for steamboat again tonight.... But my handphone doesn't seems to ring ley.... Sigh~]

Wat a coincidence... <1709>

1 year ago on this very day... Something major happen which affect me alot & change alot of things/routine in my life.....

1 year later on the same day... Another thing happen which also affect me so deeply till i do not noe how to react/express any feelings.....



I am asking myself why is sOoooo coincidence or is it jus my fate???
Tear gland wasn't working today... Was tinking is it becos last year tear gland was working rather hard which result in tearless tis year...



i tink i gonna mark tis day in my calender to be my NOT MY DAY!!!

i hate 1709...

Having really bad mood today... My colleague just asked me wat happen to me cos haven heard my voice almost the whole day... I also dunno y ley... Jus gt no mood to speak! Or should i say no good words will cum out from my mouth now... I rather i kip quiet than hurt people with evil words... Heading home in a few min time... Thank god my work day is ending... I tink i got no mood to stay home later... Go home then decide bah...